Starting off can be exhilarating. There are so many new things to try that trying to pick just one is a task in and of itself. Even attending events can be a lot to take in; everyone seems to have their own little specialty and niche, and oh the outfits! At the vanilla-friendly events, it
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The internet is an odd thing. It is both ephemera and very permanent. The news or meme of the day will flit by and be lost in the chaos to be replaced with something just as vapid. Scandal and anything that has been posted will hang on, even if you think you have taken profiles,
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I am sitting here having woken after an excellent play party. Sitting is all I can do. I forgot to do what I try to do with people when I have scenes with them- Aftercare. Aftercare is one of those things that most people think of for the sub or bottom. The water in hand
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Limits, Boundaries, Frontiers, Event Horizons. These are my definitions.
What you are trying to do when delving into kink is challenge yourself. I have a way of looking at it that has helped some of my clients understand what they have really wanted from a session.
One of the primary aspects of BDSM is submission–and the trust that goes along with it. For some, the submission is physical, for others it is mental, and for others it is merely situational. Almost every aspect of BDSM has some degree of “giving up control”. There are a lot of reasons why people enjoy
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Just like with anything with ‘Pro’ attached to it, there are differences between a Hobbyist Dom and a Pro Dom. A Hobbyist can get away with just about anything when they play with a partner. A Pro has to keep the law in mind for most of their actions, and some inactions. When you pay someone for something, you expect to get what you want, but unlike many professions, a Pro-Dom’s services can vary greatly from State to State, even town to town.
The last Soft Kink article addressed the concept of service in a relationship with power dynamics. Some people are more interested in the “bondage” part of BDSM, but aren’t quite ready for the “hard stuff”. That’s okay. You don’t need tempered steel and PVC to be kinky.
When going into the BDSM lifestyle, sometimes it is hard to know where you fit in. If you are feeling submissive and are looking for a Dominant, you have to be cautious how you phrase what you want, and it starts with the role you play. I am not talking about putting on a french maid outfit or a leather loincloth, I mean the basic role you play in the scene.
Previous articles in MadisonKink have given an overview of “soft kink”. Those articles introduced the concept, but didn’t offer any specific advice on how to actually go about it. Here are a few suggestions of service-oriented tasks for those looking to explore a softer side of kink.
One of the simplest and most pervasive aspects of BDSM is the power dynamic. Life is, of course, filled with power dynamics and power exchanges. We have them at work, at school, in our families, and with our friends. But BDSM is the one place where we engage in these dynamics specifically for the thrill of the dynamic. While the acts may look the same from the outside, the intent–and the thrill–is quite different.
