What started out as a way of life, an interest, a passion, has become my job. While I love it as much as when I started, I am finding that I am beginning to get a little disillusioned. I am now shocked when I come face to face with a genuine fetishist, and no longer
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I decided I needed to read Fifty Shades of Grey by E. L. James to see what all of the hoopla was about. Reportedly this is a NY Times bestseller about BDSM.  The reviews I had read were pretty mixed. But I was shocked to see numerous Facebook proclamations by some of the most buttoned
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The world is full of stories and injunctions warning us against the dangers of an array of activities too vast to catalog. Why? Because we need something to fear. Humans are a pack animal that evolved their social nature (partly) as a protective mechanism. One human couldn’t stand up to the predators, but a pack
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Yes, this is going to be a little bit of a rant.  Be aware and proceed with caution. It is currently Monday morning while I write this.  I just waded through almost an hour’s worth of messages that had piled up in the ‘in’ box for one of the social media websites I belong to. 
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By now you have probably heard of the book Fifty Shades of Grey. You know that BDSM romance novel a.k.a Twilight fan fiction a.k.a mommy porn? I figured you were probably aware of it, even if you haven’t read it yet. It has been on covers of magazines, TV shows, and of course all over the internet.
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Recently, I was asked about how I like my subs to service me.  I made a quip about on their knees, which made the person laugh.  What they meant was, what things do I like having done for me by a sub to make my life easier. That led to several good conversations, and having
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I frequently hear from clients that they wish they could be themselves in front of others. They want to  show off their marks, talk about their weekend adventures, or discuss the complicated nature of their relationship without fear of being treated poorly in return. This makes perfect sense. It is so hard when we  feel
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The last Soft Kink article addressed the concept of service in a relationship with power dynamics. Some people are more interested in the “bondage” part of BDSM, but aren’t quite ready for the “hard stuff”. That’s okay. You don’t need tempered steel and PVC to be kinky.

Psychotherapists that are not just kink-friendly, but actually understand and support kink, are few and far between. Madison is lucky enough to have two. Jay Blevins, MS, MFT is one. Jay has had a private practice, Awen Therapy, in the Madison area since May 2009 and often collaborates with Jasmine St. John, LMFT, Madison’s other
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Part II – Talking to the lawyer where BDSM may be related to your case Please remember from Part I last month that this is not the same as “you think it might be possible to slide by without having to mention it”. Common example: your spouse is divorcing you. Both of you do BDSM
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